#44 Metacognition, Manifesting and Biz with Tar'Kesa Colvin

Tar'Kesa Colvin can be found: @TColvinConsulting on Instagram
Her book is at CatalystEbook.com
Facebook Group is: facebook.com/groups/WholeCEO

We chat it up on metacognition and its role in manifesting, as well as great questions to ask yourself to know yourself better, as well as to know if/when/how entrepreneurship is for you. Tar'Kesa is a pro at mindset and manifesting and a biz guru. You're going to love her and this episode.

The Money Manifesting Magic class can be found at bit.ly/MMMForever and use code "podcast" for $111 off the price!

Join me in the Manifest It Sis Facebook group facebook.com/groups/Manifestitsis

Let's be friends on Instagram @TheDaniFaust

Transcript

Okay. So with that illustrious bio here she is the woman, the myth, the legend Todd Kessler Coleman. Hi,

thank you for joining me here. I am excited for the manifest. It's this audience, audience to meet. You hear about your amazing. And I, and just hear your unique perspective because you, you and I, through our conversations, you've given me some interesting aspects of your perspective on faith, on manifesting on life, on business.

And I know that the audience is going to really get some gems. So ladies, get your notes, ready? Get your notes app or your pen and paper. If you're old school like me, cause I know it's our class, it was going to be dropping the nuggets. Okay. No pressure, no pressure. Give us your best. Be at 10. So my first question I love to ask is what does manifesting mean to you?

You know, I'm manifesting, I'm going to go real, like super structured. And I know it's going to be like what, when I think about manifesting, I think about the term metacognition. And it's simply that, you know, it's a big way to say, thinking about what you're thinking about. That's what manifesting means to me.

Like being intentional about the things that you imagine that you're creating in your mind, because, you know, so a man thinks, so is he right? And so that's what it means to me. I almost feel like I'm doing a book report and in conclusion, I believe in conclusion, but yeah, that's what it means to me.

And so like, The way that I, the reason I say it that way is because it can be so easy to be like, manifestation. Isn't a thing because you can't see it, or, you know what I mean? And so. Well, you can't see thoughts either. Right. But they're there. And so it's the same thing for me. I think we can see thoughts.

Cause like this was a thought now it's in my hand now it's in my head. But yeah. I love that. And metacognition, first of all, that's a word that we don't use often enough. Makes me sound fancy. Just saying,

yeah. So thinking about what you're thinking, I mean, that is intentionality that is mindfulness all at play. And then when you do that, like you said, so is she, so here you go being yourself. So what you were always manifesting as ourselves. I like that perspective. Layers layers. What are you manifesting?

What are you currently manifesting? I am manifesting peace in every area of my life. What does that look like for you? That looks like, you know what, not having an alarm set. That looks, let's just say that right there just sound right there. Not, not leaning into the wanting of a thing, but just really believing.

It's cool. It's coming it's on the way. That's, it's that piece? That for me pieces, the knowing of whatever the thing is that it's on the way that I'm being properly, everything is working for my good that's, that's what the piece is. So I might not like actually see it with my eyes right now, but knowing that it's on the way.

Everything around me is working like hello overtime to make sure that that thing gets to me and, and being able to rest in that, it makes me think about like, you know, for those of us who have kids, like kids never worry about if the light switch is going to work, they just be like, right. And then of course they leave the room after they turn the light on that's another rant.

That's another, but, but there's peace for them. And the fact that. I can go and stand in the refrigerator and like there's stuff in there. I can there's peace that there's always provision. And that's what it looks like for me that feels like face. Yeah. It feels like, like, look, I'm good. I know what's coming.

I know where, when, how, why, what is going to feel like taste like smell like, but I know it's and w I think I'll go deeper. Cause you know, I'm deep. I love it. Go as deep as your faith. Yes. But the peace part is. Resting in that that's the piece part, because it can be so easy to get into the doing to try to force a thing to happen.

And like, I don't know how it works for you, but in my life it just doesn't work that way. Like the harder I try to force the thing, the more frustrated I get, and now I'm not, I'm not even operating in a place of faith. I'm operating in my own strength, which doesn't bring me to the. Which is ultimately what I want.

And so that's why I say it that way because they go hand in hand in order. I think, I think in order for them to work, I liked that the word, the way you describe it and using faith as. As the vehicle, it feels like for me allowing or like surrender, it's like, look, I know I'm not driving this bus. Right.

Someone else is driving this bus. Let me put on my seat belt and 100% there, because I mean, when you think about like, When you think back to five years ago when I was in high school? No, I'm kidding. But like, think back right when I was younger, remember how they will be, like, where do you see yourself in five years?

And you would create these whole plans of things. And like, and like, for some of us, if we look back at that, it's like I'm behind in life. But at the same time, did I really, even, I didn't even know who I was at that point. Like, so trying to navigate a planet. And at the same time, figuring out who the hell you are, that's stress.

And we do that every single day. Like the things that I thought that I wanted, like, first of all, at 18 year old me said, I would never have children. You have 400

and manifesting some more,

but like, you know, when you think about that, Ju not just being in the moment and being present and understanding what your wants are like. Yes. I have big dreams and that's fine. That's absolutely okay. But I don't have to force try to force those things to be my right now, because as I grow that may change and you and I have talked about, you know, yes, I help people with businesses, but what if they don't want a million dollar business?

Why am I going to try to force them? To do that. That doesn't mean that they don't want the life that they want. That just means that their vision is not my vision or who, whoever who's ever. And so yeah, you have to stop me cause you know, no, this is a podcast you're supposed to be talking and I was supposed to be not.

Okay. So it's working perfectly.

I love it because, okay, so you said something that cracked me up because I always see the means like, man, I thought by the time I was 25, I'd be married. 30. I'd have to get 40 avenue. Retired. Yeah. Like what kind of timeline where we planning at 18? Like really, first of all, what we're doing is getting ready to go to the club or like the movies or something.

Let's go back to what you stayed married at 25 at 25. Oh my God. I'm like at 25, I don't even think I was regularly feeding myself. Okay. Grocery shopping was like, I want some candy, like, like, oh, and some apple juice, like how old are you? Like, and then yeah. So none of that lines up, right. We were actually emulating and saying the dreams that our parents had for.

Or the movies had that we saw. Right? Cause when I was in my teens and early, it was romcom world. And so it was all these romantic comedies where, you know, I'm going to be a wedding planner and I'm going to read like shut up, shut up J-Lo and I'm like, I should do that. Like I can barely plan for all of us to get out of the house at the same time.

I won't be a winning plan. But like, that's the other thing, remember I said, thinking about what you're thinking about. So the thing about metacognition is that, let me tell you about thoughts, right? So if y'all, and you can Google it, I'm telling you, we have roughly about, I think it's 7,000 thoughts a day.

That's it. Then I honestly, I was like, you're going to say like 70,000, because I feel like my head is like, but here's the thing they're on autopilot. So it might actually be more that are slipping through the cracks. Now here's the thing when it comes to your thoughts and when you start thinking about what you're thinking about, you essentially think the same thought consistently from the date that the seed was planted.

So a prime example, y'all, I'm about to tell you all my business. I was dating a guy one time for a really long time and it wasn't good. It wasn't good. He didn't meant, but like, I feel like every day for however long we were together, he would make little comments about my weight. So those were seeds that were planted.

And so when I would have those thoughts, it was a reoccurring of the seeds that he had planted that disrupted my thoughts about my. Right. So when you think about what you're thinking about, you'll come across something in your black, did that come from you just kind of took over, they just put this, this rogue seed in your garden and you've been watering it all this time.

And you're like, this is my tomatoes. It's time to get the whole.

All of that. Like, going back to what I was saying, like your parents were like, you're going to be a doctor and it's like, I can't tie my shoes. Can we hold off? Let me get, let me get my shoe string situation together before we decide who a career on my head. Right. And so those things are just in our heads.

You're going to be the first person to go to college in our family. And like all of these things get planted and you're like, I'm going to be the first. I gotta be the, so you're kind of walking around. Like I got to be the be. And guess what, what if that's not your calling? What if that's not what you're supposed to do?

So now your, your, what you are really trying to create or here to create because of a seed that was planted, that's going rogue and your thoughts. I like that. So it's, it's, it's like, you're thinking about what you're thinking, but you're also like in thinking about your thoughts, you're thinking of. Why it's there, where it came from and how do I get this outta here?

Does it serve me? Does it not serve me? Exactly. That is intentional part of it. And in my work when I'm supporting people and one of my most powerful questions is who told you that she was like, people are like, you know, when people say I can't do so. And so because of this, and I'm like, who told you that?

It's a very simple question, right? Usually it's like I don't either. I don't know which means, well, does it belong there if you don't know, or if you told yourself and you make that declaration, I said that. So if you said that cancer say something else, there it is. Right. So very, very simple, yet. Very complicated because it's about building that.

Right. You can't do it that one time you got to keep doing it. Like, if I can do sit ups and have an app, I just said

app. I would like, if I can do that one, sit up and be like, boom, I got an app. Like, I would be fine, but that's not how it works. So you have to do the work of. And so there's a I think it's a, it's either a Chinese proverb or Japanese proverb that says you're be mindful of your thoughts because they become your words.

Be mindful of your words because  then it shapes your habits and your habits shape your character and your character impacts your momentum and how you reach your goals and dreams. It's a trickle down, right. Just manifests, right? It is. Absolutely. And then, so I guess I wouldn't say it the same way, but it would be like, you know, you know, they simplify it with thoughts, become things, but in between thought and things, a whole lot of things going on.

So in between that thought comes. The action that comes from it, the emotion that comes from it, it goes electro magnetic. And then there comes the manifestation. Yeah. I love that. And I liked that. I liked so with manifesting people have different words that they use for it. They have different angles that they come in.

Like my husband he's very like scientific, he'll go the, the science, the psychology and the quantum physics way into. I have friends who come in through like the most spiritual woo woo kind of way. I have friends that come in through very strict religion, different religions, you know, kind of way, but it's all the same thing.

It's all the same product. Whichever angle we come at it. We're all saying the same thing. Yeah. So that says one thing, this is definitely real and no one could deny it because of all these different modalities are saying it. And two, we need to stop fighting against ourselves and make it easy food, because it's clearly what we're here to do.

Like we are creator beings, right? Yeah. 100%. So with this metacognition, how have you used it to change your life? One thing that I have done is I, I consistently use it and I have used it. I use it to help reshape my vision of myself. You know, we all have those moments, like I said before, where it's like, I'm supposed to be at this point in my life.

I now it's like, well, who said that? Well, I say that, well, guess what? Say something else. Like, you know, that kind of thing. And like, The power of the pep talk. Have you ever given yourself a pep talk and you come out and you'd be like, yeah, like that's it white. That is metacognition. That is planting a new seed that is reframing.

As we say, you know, I do that every day. I have to do it every day, because guess what? There are days when I need to give myself grace and I need to say the right things to myself, to allow myself to give myself grace. Right. Like, I spent a lot of time talking to myself. I don't know, but you know, that's important.

Like there are days when you, you know what, I have an agenda full of things. And I just can't today that listen to understand that. Yeah. I want you to speak to that because I feel like a lot, listen to this. First of all, that positive self-talk she was talking about, I want you to do it. I don't want you to do it in the mirror everyday girl, make it a habit.

Okay. Because if you're not living on you, who will, so there's that, but I want you to speak to that part about actually listening to that urge to like, I just can't because I feel like a lot of people feel like, oh, I gotta, I gotta push. I gotta hustle. I got the world's on my shoulders. Who's going to do it. If I don't. Can you talk to listening to your, to yourself around shutting up and sitting down and being quiet and still?

So this is something that I have, you know, found specifically with, with tenacious. Driven women. We have these visions for ourselves and our lives and how things are supposed to be. And also with those hard standards, we have just no room for grace first. We will give everybody around us, grace for not wearing the superhero Cape, but not ourselves.

And I can tell you, you know, just a snippet of my story, building multiple businesses and things like that. I looked around a couple years ago in a couple, you know, the people you're around are usually doing the same thing you're doing. So me and my friends, we were building businesses and we were moving and shaking.

And one of my good friends we had just celebrated. She had. Closed a six-figure corporate contract. And we were like, yes, honey, come through, we go on the thing. And then a few weeks later she had a stroke and it was like, I was like, what the hell? We are way too young and flat with this. And then a few weeks later, my doctor said, listen, I don't know what you do for a living, but you need to change it because.

Getting close to stroke levels. And I was like, same words. I don't like this. What is this? And it was because I was building my business the way someone else told me I had to. And so, because there wasn't alignment, I had to work at it harder and longer and more hours and more attentively than I would have if I had just figured out what worked for me.

And so with that, You know, my body was saying like, yo, Hey I know you're busy. Well, we've been working 12 hours and I just like some water if you don't mind, you know, so you know, it, it was things like that looking up and, you know, having no emotional bandwidth. And I was, I was messaging a mentor on a Saturday morning at 5:00 AM crying, like my business, another fail.

And she's like first and foremost, when she woke up at 10, why were you messaging me at five o'clock on a Saturday? And so I was like I didn't know. I didn't know. Good question. I don't know. And so that part, I wasn't listening to myself. And so I know the question was like, how do you have more grace?

But first and foremost, how do you even know when you need to give yourself grace? Yeah, we don't listen to ourselves. We'll be like, it's just a headache. Okay. Well, headaches on last. Right. I'm just tired, but you're always tired. That's not how it's supposed to be. Right. And so it's things like that. Like if our loved ones came to us like that, we will be all over them.

Like I will, I'm gonna make an appointment right now. Like we would do the things, but we don't do that for ourselves. For some reason. And I think this is a root a, see, we all have to uproot. For some reason, we have decided that if we get help, then the success doesn't count. Hmm. That is a lie from the pits of whatever you believe.

Flight is not accurate, right. Having help and support does not negate the win,

having help and support does not negate the winter. When you think about some of the most powerful, influential people, they have teams that move with them and know them and can support them effectively. I don't know why we have to feel like, oh, I gotta change my clothes in the bathroom at work. And then I got to go and be the soccer mom.

And then I got to also, I gotta bake 157 cookies for the bake sale. And I got to do the thing and I got to do my girlfriend's hair. Cause I told her I would, and I got. And please embrace the ministry of no. Do you know how powerful say, I know you're going to get this call saying no, we'll help you manifest the things that you need.

Amen. Right? You can't say yes to everything and manifest what you truly need, because you're not in alignment. You have to think of manifesting like this. You are manifesting means you're standing in position with your arms open because it's going to pour directly into your arms. Right? And so if you are, you have volunteered to, I don't know, mode, the football field is everything sports.

I don't know you, you volunteer to do that. Y who said that that's that's my, you know, and so getting in position to, to manifest is important. Yeah. And so the funny thing is, as we're talking about this, like Danny, you know me, but like when I tell people I'm a ministry school dropout and they're like, oh, is that right?

I'm like, yeah. But no, I was like, but no, it's fine. I'm fine. It's okay. I had to learn my relationship with God and who I believe in it's. And I'm a hundred percent that, and I shared about this a couple of days ago. I think God is so ready to bless me and help me walk into the things that I'm trying to manifest.

Like, I really think I'm getting on his nerves right now. He's like, if you would just need to know a step two and just to the right, I've been holding this thing, trying to hand it to you all this time. Right. I feel like that. And so manifest thing is very personally. And it's, it's not something that's magical.

I mean, you know, it's not like, oh, only certain people could like, that's my, how this works. That's not how this works. You, I want to back up a little bit too. I'm talking about. That shift you had, so you had the friend had the stroke, you got the stroke possible kind of news. And it gave you this structure that it gave you this turnaround.

It sounds like, and you were able to kind of embrace the know and recognize like, what the hell am I doing? What do you suggest for the woman who was in that space? Like, no, I got a rush. I got to hustle. I gotta do this. And that. What do you say to the woman who's mowing the football field right now? How.

Get like stop. How does she move out of that space? First of all, she's going to have to have that tough conversation with herself, because think about what the doctor told me. I don't know what you do, but you are approaching basically what he said is you're manifesting a stroke, right? Like when someone says you're on your way to, you're about to, if you keep at this rate, like that's a warning sign, like you're manifesting this thing.

I'm sure you don't want. And so you have to ask, okay, is mowing this football field? What is it going to manifest for me, for me, it made my knees don't hurt. I'm not trying to manifest that. It's a no for me. So you got. Look at what that's going to manifest for you. And is it in alignment with what you're actually intentionally trying to manifest?

If the answer is no, then the answer is no. So let's talk about alignment for a second, for a woman who is shifting out of a place of, I got to do, do, do to be valuable. I got to do to do, to be loved and she's shifting out there and like, okay. I know I don't want to do all these things. I don't even know how to, how to say no to them yet, but how do I know what's in alignment for me?

What'd you say? What I say to that woman is you got to spend some time with you. You have got to spend some time with you makeup off facade off, and I recommend writing, like getting an, a journal. That you, where you can be a hundred percent transparent with yourself and say saying the shit you're you, you wouldn't want to say out loud for whatever reason, because it's not prem because it's, non-profit what it, you know, eh, whatever, but say those things in that journal, because that's going to free you and that's going to, that's going to be your mirror.

Right. And so if it's like, I don't even like the pizza. Why am I, why am I the president of the P I don't even like the BCA, you know what I'm saying? They'll see rowdy. I don't care about the bake sale. Like, you know what I'm saying? So if that's how you're feeling, what do you do with that? Your true feelings.

That's your true raw consciousness, right? Of, I don't like this thing you're not putting on for yourself or any of that. So now you have, you know, I love to say this, you have good data to make another decision. Who am I doing this for? If like, I just don't feel like, you know, kid is being bullied on the playground because you're not a part of the PTA.

You know what I mean? So it'll help you destroy whatever story you have told yourself to justify. Doing this thing that probably killing your soul, draining your spirit, that doesn't allow you to be your authentic, happy notice. I didn't say your authentic self. Like if you pull up to whatever the thing is, and you were in the car and you got to go, okay, girl, let's go, let's get it together.

And let's go in here and make some things like if you gotta do that laptop, you need to spend some time with. Because you're not listening to you. And then this is this, this contribute. So think about the number of times you have committed to something. And then you had a physical element that popped up that used to happen to me often, the number of size, like, oh, I got to go to salsa.

Oh, my knee just went.

Like your body and spirit are trying to like, Hey, yeah, we'd rather stay here. Right? Like none of that stuff is an accident. You know, you people have said it for years. You can worry yourself sick. It's the same thing. You're gonna ignore yourself. Sick. It's true. Can. And I love that you suggest the journal because there is something about seeing it in black and white seeing truth in black and white versus kind of like nebulous in your head.

It's a whole different ball game. It's like, well, oh shit, there's a truth. Right, right. It's harder to, it's harder to go against yourself once you have like put it out in black and white and like real candid and listeners. I know you're getting lots of gems from, from . Wisdom. I want to remind you that she is not a manifestation coach or teacher, but she sure does sound like what actually a business guru and Excel.

My Excel guru person was XL group, but no, she's she is. Business whiz and she helps people build their business. Let me just say, organize themselves to build their business. And I know that from the feedback that I've gotten from a lot of you guys who listen, that there are a lot of you who are interested in building a business, so has doesn't work with the newbies.

So I know you all are ready to jump into her inbox. Don't worry. You're gonna get her contact information in a minute. Okay. Or if you're watching on YouTube, you can just scroll down, but wait till after. Okay. We got more. For those who are new and might be like, Ooh, I want to build a business, but I don't know.

You know, I've got so much going on in my life. I've got kids, husband and I that, and they, they know that there's something pulling them in that direction, but they're just not taking the leap. What do you say to that woman? So that woman, how do you know you're supposed to build a business? Well, I'm just that, you know, there's just questions.

No, but ask yourself, how do you know, is it that you're supposed to build a business because you really want freedom? Is it that it's the freedom that you perceive that goes with entrepreneurship, because then there's some more work that you have to do before you just dive into building a business for freedom, right?

Is it about the money? Like people love to say it's really not about the money. It's not a business. If it's not about money, you can have a mission driven business that makes money. I just wanna put that out there. I don't know who needed that, but take that, but why what's your why? Right. People want it to be some huge, phenomenal, like deep, but sometimes it's like, I was not, I was not designed to work in corporate.

That is my why? Why is because I can see, I have an amazing ability to see systems and be like, that's not right. That's not going to go with it. And then it makes me, makes it hard for me to commit to that system. If I know it's broken, I don't make a good employee. I don't make a good employee. I'm coachable, but it has to make sense.

I'm all that about my. What did you know about yourself when it comes to trying to get into entrepreneurship? Especially if you're shifting from a nine to five type situation, isn't that you just don't align with your boss. Right. And I know it's like, oh, she's trying to determine me. No, ma'am, I'm trying to help you have a strong foundation, because if you know why, like me knowing that I don't make a good employee is kind of why I'm on board.

Like, I'm like, listen, I don't wanna waste your time. So you don't need a resume. Give me that back because this isn't going to go with no, but I know that about myself out also, when you think about, for everybody, I'm going to pause a second for everybody. Who's thinking of becoming a business owner, you have to know that there's a demand for what it is that you want to.

I spent so many years, then you've heard these stories, creating shit that nobody asked for. And I'm like, I'm a business owner. I created a course. And the other part of that is that nobody asked for, and therefore nobody show up where the demands. There, can you imagine going to a doctor and you're like, Hey, listen, my neck, I don't know what's going on with my neck.

It's really bothering me. And the doctor being like, all right, take your shoes off. And you're like, no, no, no, it's my neck. Yeah. Yeah, go ahead. Antos. You're not listening to my need, so you're, you're going to leave and you're going to dare them to charge you a copay. So siren rules. Listen to what people want and make the decision.

If that's something you can commit to providing, it's just that simple start there before you go off and create a whole university of content that nobody has for. I like that. Yes. So that, that was like the. The beginner, newbie, I don't know, kind of gal. So what about, I've been in business for a year? I've made a little money.

I feel stuck. I can't get off this plateau. I feel like I'm spinning my wheels. What do you say to that person? So maybe she's making 50 to a hundred K she's she's growing her little baby business, but she feels stuck. What do you say to that level of, of, okay, so first and foremost is the stuck external oriented.

Because if it's an internal stuff, then that's a mindset thing. That's a not being present in your progress thing. That's a comparison thing, probably if it's an internal thing. Right. But if it's an external thing, it's, you know, I take these people as far as I can go and I really don't know what to do next.

That's different. That means you got to do some rolling up your sleeves and start asking questions. Like, okay, you've been working with me for six months. We've accomplished these things. What are some, where do you need more support? What do you want to work on next? What do you think your next investment is going to be?

That's all external. Right. It could be like, if you're anything like me, creatives, we get bored and we like, listen, I help 50 people do this. I'm tired. Now I'm tired of this. I want to do something else. What are y'all thinking about painting houses? No, but like, you know, you want to mix it up a little bit.

And so that, that can be. Being a business visionary. Who's a creative, it can be tough, but I, I say start with an internal check of the step stuckness and an external check, because then you'll know the right questions to ask, to get unstuck or who to bring in to help you get on stuff. I like that. Okay.

And so now this is the next person is the range that targets to actually work works with. So ladies, if this is you and you're in need of guidance, this is the woman who called. Trust me. So, so she's at 1 50, 200 K and her business she's been at it for a few years. She feels solid. She might have a small team or, you know, a distance team.

She wants to move to the next level. She's like, I'm ready to grow. I'm ready to be the next somebody or who that or this one. So what do you say to that woman? How do you support that level of. So that woman, I have a lot of questions. No. So that woman, she needs to first and foremost, figure out where she's spending the majority of her time.

Right? If she, if her hands are in everything in order for her to have that 200 K business or what have you, that's a problem because if you got your hands in everything, How do you scale? You can only hold so many things in your hand. It reminds me when my grandmother would say, I need you to help me get the groceries out of the car.

And I would try to get as many of those suckers as I could, because I really don't want to make more than one trip. And of course a bag would break. And now I got to hear the speech about make multiple trips. You got too many things in your hand, same rules. See grandmother works. I I'm using it. No, but same rules apply.

If you have too many things in your hand, you're not going to make the progress that you want. So you're going to have to figure out what do you need to start pulling yourself out of what needs to be automated? What needs to be delegated? Because that's the only way you're going to grow and have the capacity to do the thing.

At some point, you need to be the face of the, of the business, right? Because your process is proven at this. You know how to, you know, who you're talking to. They know you're talking to them, your messaging works. You know how to get them from point a to point B whatever your offer is. You've proven that you've probably got tons of testimonials, so you're not proving those processes anymore.

There should be some automation in there, right. That lets people know, Hey, doors are open to such and such. If you're still doing all of that manually, you might wanna start. Because you, you are the bottleneck. You can't get to the seven figure mark, as long as you're putting your hands in everything. And don't even get me started about spending seven hours a day.

Don't do that back in my blogging days. Like how do I get this picture to

No, no, but like, it's time for you to delegate, to elevate. And so if you are not, if you're not positioned to do that, you got to look at what are all of the things that my hands are in, what processes do I have that rest here? I'm really the only one in here to know. Because you've got a document, those processes you're if you're paying people, even if you're outsourcing something, if they're sitting at any time saying, or you get a number of emails, messages, WhatsApps, or whatever they say, what do you need me to do?

You're not delegating properly. You're not start there. I love the way you are. Just like bada Bing, bada boom, like brass tacks, straight facts. We're not sugarcoating this, like knit it together. Ms. Entrepreneur. Is that what it's like working with you when you're, this is how you talk to them lot. Girls get ready.

Hey, but I love the realness because I feel like sometimes a lot of coaches kind of fluff up the messaging and have people in LA land when they really need to be focused on what's going on in their science. I, I talked specifically to the women who let's just be honest, you're making six figures on. And because your hands are in so many things, you are navigating fees and family like nobody's business.

So like last month you might've made $30,000, but this month you're like, does anyone have a Starbucks coupon? Anybody you want to go in on a twofer? Like, you know, whatever. And so those are the women that I'm talking to. I'm talking to the women that if you look at their social media, you're like they live in their bed.

But they're like I was, when is the last time I was asleep? I just messaged my mentor at 5:00 AM. Like, because they're doing all the. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. It's funny. The Instagram live and the behind the scenes are very different for a lot of people. And as a coach, I'm sure Virginia hang like I am with all my clients.

And if you could talk, you'd be like child. What about this band-aids and spikes situation, because.

It's like, don't look at the man behind the curtain. You don't want to see that guy. Yeah. It's, it's, it's different. It's really different. So it's good that entrepreneurs have someone like you who give them the straight with the loving smile, you know, give them the straight, the real deal. I know you have all these different processes and systems.

I know your mind works like that. My. Like this background, nurse works very organized and precise, and I know you have all your different systems. So let me know, let everyone know what you've got going on now, what you have on offer and where people can find you. I know you have a nice gift for everybody.

You got to get to. So here's the thing. I'd like to get to know people in their businesses. Right. I don't make any assumption that I can support you or anything like that. I love to teach. I love to talk. I don't know if y'all notice that. No, I know I'm such an introvert, but you know, I would, I like to get people into my community, which is the whole CEO, w H O L E.

And the reason that that's important to me is because we're hoping. And so often as we've just talked about as women, we don't operate that way. We wear all the hats except the one that says, take care of yourself, girl, what'd you doing? Like when's the last time you drank some water? Like, so and so inside of that community is where I like to hang out and I, we have safe conversations.

Like I had a whole conversation about the myths that crushed businesses and the number one thing I wanted to tell people is. Business credit is great, but you can't treat it like your personal credit. At some point, you're going to have to make some money to pay this business credit. Right. And like, people were like, Oh, we talking about this and I'm like, yeah, we are, you know if you don't know what your business numbers are, how do you make good decisions in your business?

And people were like, let me go and pull my stuff together. Because when we're talking about Tara Cassa gathered me just the other day, I asked a simple question. I was like, man, I need a new lead man. She was like, well, what are the metrics on this? What are the, how do you know this was not working, but I'm just like, I just need some idea of why she asked me.

I was like, oh, I'm G I'm outta here. It was too many questions. I was like, why is she asking me logical questions here? But. With Israeli. Great. I know you're doing the money leaks in your business guys, if you're trying to make it doesn't matter where you are actually in your business. If you're trying to be a whole CEO, I would suggest you get into her group because just her wisdom and then the wisdom of the other women in the group is super beneficial.

And you'll learn, even if you're like, Ooh, I don't know. Do I belong there? You'll learn just from. Absorbing watching, reading, learning in the group and talking about the gift. Let me tell you, I am gifting everyone. My book, it's the thriving CEO secrets to strategic planning, your way to six and seven figures.

And you may be saying, you know what, I'm not there yet, but it's for you. And I'm going to tell you why there's a whole breakdown inside of this book, that, that tackles a process that I created called the toxic pricing test. And so the toxic pricing tests will help you figure out exactly where you are.

If your pricing is what's killing your progress, it can be, it can be, I am not negating the fact that it can be an internal game. Prevents you from raising your prices, but it's also, like I said before, you got internal, you got external. I guarantee you, if you go through this process, you will at least three extra pricing and it won't even have anything to do with ego.

You will quickly get past the, who am I to charge this. You will quickly get past that. If you go through this test and I stand behind that. Just think about how many times you pick a price and you're like, oh wow, I'm exhausted. I'm over this. Like all of the effort and all of the, it almost is not it's no, it's not almost, it's totally not worth it.

Right. When you think about what it takes for you to deliver the thing, you're like I'm in the hole. I don't like the way this feels inside. Also inside of my ebook, there's a breakdown over my, of my strategic planning process. And I know you hear strategic planning. You're like, oh my God. I just like Danny.

Oh my God. No, I even register it. My ears don't hear that frequently. It was like, I didn't, I have no idea what she said. No, but inside of there, there's just worksheets in there. They're really helped you start to wrap your head around your business numbers, where you are. It's important to put on the C E O hat as early as you can in the process.

There are, there are things that I wish I had done that would have kept me from those, you know, almost trying to manifest a stroke. Right. I learned from that. And that's why I take this so seriously, we can be profitable. We can be productive and we can be present in our lives. But the start of that is knowing where we are in our business.

And so that's what this ebook does. It's a workbook you can PDF and print it out and all that kind of stuff. And, and it will really help you to start showing up in a more effective way in your. I promise you, like I said, when you start raising prices and people tell you, I, you know, I don't know why you charge that.

You will quickly be like, well, let me tell you something, let me help you understand this isn't for you. There it is. Right. So apologetic. Unapologetic in order to grab your gift, simply go to catalyst, ebook.com and I'll spell it because if you're anything like me, thank God for spell check it's C a T a L Y S T E book.com.

And I hope you enjoyed it. And I hope. Yeah, you guys, all of her links, social site, the catalyst ebook, the Facebook group, all of that is in the show notes. And if you're watching on YouTube is down below. Talk has that. I want to ask one last question and I'm literally scared.  When I, when, so listeners, when I invited guests, I sent a quick little survey with a few questions and they ask like, oh, what would you like me to ask you? And what would you like? What information would you like to leave with the audience?

And Tara has said something very interesting. And I know I'm opening a can of worms, but she said you have exactly the life you desire. And I wonder, I read it. I was like, oh, that makes sense. And then I came back to it, like, wait, hold up. So before I take my spin on this, I want to hear, what does that mean?

What does that mean? It means everything in your life. The good, the bad, the not so cute. You that's your desire level and therefore, cause we've been talking about metacognition. So whatever that looks like across the board, every category, that's the level of desire that you have been operating and vibrating in whatever your term is.

That's what you're aligned with. That's what. So, if you are someone who lacks balance, meaning you don't have the level of joy across the board, you have that, you know, that's because your joy, your level of desire for joy in different areas is. Here higher with family. It's lower at work. It's higher with, you know, extended family.

In-laws it's lower, you know? So the thing that you are intentional about that desire level is what I mean. So if you want things to look different, when it comes to. You got to change your desire level. So maybe you don't desire to be with that company anymore. Maybe you do desire to be an entrepreneur. So you've got to get aligned with the, the level of desire that's going to bring you joy consistently.

Not that's why I said joy, not having this per se, but joy consistently. Otherwise you're going to have, and you're going to, you'll be one of those people that says, I thought she had it all together. But family falling apart, health falling apart, you are responsible for creating the vision. You're the CEO of YouTube, right?

So you're responsible for creating and holding the vision. And so that's how I met the desire is it's your vision for yourself? So if this is what you've envisioned and you ain't liking the way it's actually looking. Do that, or you got to up your game, you got to up your desire level. Does that make sense?

It makes absolute sense. And you're so much more sweet and gentle and eloquent than I was thinking when I read it. And it was like, you have exactly the life you desire in my head. It was. So stop complaining because you asked for this man, you got it. You're just so much sweeter I was going with. No, it's like, you'll like it.

Change it. Oh, well, come on. Let's go. You can about something else.

No, no, it's more of a thermometer. I like it so much more gentle, like a chill,

I guess. Thank you a million times for joining me on this podcast today. I know the listeners were like Google and what does metacognition mean? Right. And I just, this was a real treat. I appreciate you joining us. Thank you very much, listeners. I want what's your. My Instagram is T Coleman consulting. Okay.

I want you, when you listen to this, I want you to share on instant stories, tag T Colvin consulting, tag lead, any files I will share you out. I want to know what was the gym that hits you in your solar plexus? Because I know she gave you a few of those today. Thank you again to our Kesa. Thank you guys for listening.

I will see you in a week. I